I took a little time this morning to look over the blog posts from my past. You remember the ones? The ones that were so very honest and so very personal, that when I took the job in Macon, I was told I might want to move in a different direction?
I miss those kind of posts.
I am sure my readers do also.
I had more exchange, more conversation, more blog-relationships built by sharing pieces of my life. I was more anonymous in a larger city. Here, it's different. I have not formed the type of close relationships with those that may or may not know me and would be willing to protect or keep the gossip mongers at bay. It's sad really. It's the one thing I always complained about when I lived in Birmingham - was the fact that Macon was like one big fish bowl. Those inside the bowl were swimming furiously, feeling self important and not realizing there is a whole big world out there that think completely different than they do. I never did like the fish bowl. Somehow, I was thrown back in to swim, but I find myself swimming counter clockwise...
I just can't bring myself to swim with the rest of them.
I just don't play the "game" very well. I am definitely not a (as someone in LM said,) a jelly maker. I'm a tree shaker. I am not very good at kissing up to people, nor do I EVER pretend to like people that are.. in my humble opinion.. not of good character. I love to laugh, I love to learn, I love to share ideas. But I will NOT behave the way I have seen some potential leaders act.
When I say potential, I am talking about people in their 30s and 40s. Not quite in the top leadership positions, but next in line. They groom us here for that stuff. I swear! I find myself entering into that world and I want more than anything to continue to do the right thing. I want to fight the good battle.. not be like the rest of them.
There is a campaign in town to remind everyone to love Macon. Which I always will. But I think it is more important to fix what needs fixing. What needs fixing? Access to affordable health care. Create more jobs. Increase the graduation rate. Decrease teen pregnancy. Provide better affordable housing. Stop the gentrification of traditional African American neighborhoods. Clean up the trash. Increase recycling efforts. Do even more to help the homeless and disenfranchised. FIX our public school system once and for all. STOP racism (yes, trust me.. it still exists.. on BOTH sides.)
I could go on and on and on...
I felt I just had to let it all out.. like I used to. Sure.. this may make me late for work...
But it was my morning soapbox. ;-)