Throw a little spice in it..

I like powerful stuff. Think hot sauce, altoids and strong personalities. It sort of goes back to my obsession with passion.

When I sit down for a meal, I want to taste strong herbs and spices. If something is bland, I tend to turn my nose up at it. I do this so much so, that I typically douse most dishes with either some form of vinegar or hot sauce. I will saturate my ground beef in pepper and cumin, I will make sure my melted butters are full of garlic, and if a recipe calls for a chopped onion - I go for the most pungent.

When I read a book, I want to be swept away with the characters. I want to dive in and get completely lost in the plot - I want to cry when they cry, feel terrified as they round a corner, or even feel a sense of relief when all comes together in the end. The same applies to television shows or movies. This is probably why I try to stay away from movies about animals, I am such an animal lover that I just might cry my eyes out over a movie about one.

When it comes to my relationships - same rules apply. I want to surround myself with vibrant, colorful, creative people. Passion has to be the center of the entire relationship, which would probably scare off the typical American man. When I fight - I fight hard. When I love, I love even harder. No in betweens for me, please. ;-)

That's why certain things do not appeal to me. I like bland items, but it is not something I would incorporate into my life. For example - when I go shopping, anything with color draws me instantly. I like bold, I like sparkly, I like things that add a little flavor. I am not afraid of bold eyeshadow, or colored eye liner. I wear lipstick, and will not step out of the house without perfume. I have some friends that would NEVER think of wearing a lip color or bright red shoes. I like my middle eastern pillows on my couch, while one of my dearest friend's has decorated her entire house in neutrals. It fits her, but would not do my soul any good at all.

When I meet people, and they are meek and mild, I tend to not connect as well as I do with someone who happens to be vivacious and spunky. Polished, organized, strategic turns me off - the polar opposite ignites my spirit.

Why is this? Is it chemistry? Is it simple "birds of a feather flock together?" I took the Myers-Briggs personality tests a couple of years ago and discovered I am an ENFP - Also known as the Inspirer. A quick anaylsis of this personality identified me as - Enthusiastic, idealistic, and creative. Able to do almost anything that interests them. Great people skills. Need to live life in accordance with their inner values. Excited by new ideas, but bored with details. Open-minded and flexible, with a broad range of interests and abilities.

Ding! Ding!

A little more info on my personality type:
ENFPs are warm, enthusiastic people, typically very bright and full of potential. They live in the world of possibilities, and can become very passionate and excited about things. Their enthusiasm lends them the ability to inspire and motivate others, more so than we see in other types. They can talk their way in or out of anything. They love life, seeing it as a special gift, and strive to make the most out of it.


This paragraph sort of hit the nail on the head for me:

ENFPs have an unusually broad range of skills and talents. They are good at most things which interest them. Project-oriented, they may go through several different careers during their lifetime. To onlookers, the ENFP may seem directionless and without purpose, but ENFPs are actually quite consistent, in that they have a strong sense of values which they live with throughout their lives. Everything that they do must be in line with their values. An ENFP needs to feel that they are living their lives as their true Self, walking in step with what they believe is right. They see meaning in everything, and are on a continuous quest to adapt their lives and values to achieve inner peace. They're constantly aware and somewhat fearful of losing touch with themselves. Since emotional excitement is usually an important part of the ENFP's life, and because they are focused on keeping "centered", the ENFP is usually an intense individual, with highly evolved values.

Here is another "ding ding ding" moment:

Because they are so alert and sensitive, constantly scanning their environments, ENFPs often suffer from muscle tension. They have a strong need to be independent, and resist being controlled or labelled. They need to maintain control over themselves, but they do not believe in controlling others. Their dislike of dependence and suppression extends to others as well as to themselves.

ENFPs are charming, ingenuous, risk-taking, sensitive, people-oriented individuals with capabilities ranging across a broad spectrum. They have many gifts which they will use to fulfill themselves and those near them, if they are able to remain centered and master the ability of following through.

Jungian functional preference ordering for ENFP:

Dominant: Extraverted Intuition
Auxiliary: Introverted Feeling
Tertiary: Extraverted Thinking
Inferior: Introverted Sensing

That explains my need for interesting, GOOD stuff in my life.

Then I got to thinking about my future - what career, if I should change my life's focus - should I look into?
ENFPs generally have the following traits:


Project-oriented
Bright and capable
Warmly, genuinely interested in people; great people skills
Extremely intuitive and perceptive about people
Able to relate to people on their own level
Service-oriented; likely to put the needs of others above their own
Future-oriented
Dislike performing routine tasks
Need approval and appreciation from others
Cooperative and friendly
Creative and energetic
Well-developed verbal and written communication skills
Natural leaders, but do not like to control people
Resist being controlled by others
Can work logically and rationally - use their intuition to understand the goal and work backwards towards it
Usually able to grasp difficult concepts and theories

Possible Career Paths for the ENFP:

Consultant
Psychologist
Entrepreneur
Actor
Teacher
Counselor
Politician / Diplomat
Writer / Journalist
Television Reporter
Computer Programmer, Systems Analyst, or Computer Specialist
Scientist
Engineer
****done

Now when it comes to personal relationships - what do I need to know?
Most ENFPs will exhibit the following strengths with regards to relationships issues:

Good communication skills
Very perceptive about people's thought and motives
Motivational, inspirational; bring out the best in others
Warmly affectionate and affirming
Fun to be with - lively sense of humor, dramatic, energetic, optimistic
Strive for "win-win" situations
Driven to meet other's needs
Usually loyal and dedicated

Most ENFPs will exhibit the following weaknesses with regards to relationship issues:

Tendency to be smothering
Their enthusiasm may lead them to be unrealistic
Uninterested in dealing with "mundane" matters such as cleaning, paying bills, etc.
Hold onto bad relationships long after they've turned bad
Extreme dislike of conflict
Extreme dislike of criticism
Don't pay attention to their own needs
Constant quest for the perfect relationship may make them change relationships frequently
May become bored easily
Have difficulty scolding or punishing others

Yep, yep and yep...

Now.. what about my LOVE relationship... what does the egyptian need to know about me:
ENFPs make warm, considerate, passionate partners who are generally willing, eager, and able to do whatever it takes to make The Relationship a positive place to be. They are enthusiastic, idealistic, focused on other people's feelings, and very flexible. These attributes combine to make them especially interested in positive personal relationships, and also makes them very able to promote strong relationships in fun and creative ways. ENFPs take their commitments very seriously, and are generally deeply loyal and faithful to their partners.


There are a couple of difficult relationship areas for the ENFP. The first problem is that many ENFPs have a problem leaving bad relationships. They tend to internalize any problems and take them on their own shoulders, believing that the success or failure of the relationship is their own responsibility. As perfectionists, they don't like to admit defeat, and will stick with bad situations long after they should have left. When they do leave the relationship, they will believe that the failure was their fault, and that there was surely something they could have done to save the relationship.


Sexually, The ENFP is creative, perfectionistic, playful and affectionate. Their rich fantasy world makes them fun and creative lovers, who usually have new ideas up their sleeves. They whole-heartedly embrace the opportunity for closeness with their mates, believing sexual intimacy to be a positive, fun way to express how much you love each other.


The ENFP needs to be given positive assurance and affirmation. More than one ENFP has been known to "go fishing" for compliments. They like to hear from their significant others that they are loved and valued, and are willing and eager to return the favor. They enjoy lavishing love and affection on their mates, and are creative and energetic in their efforts to please. The ENFP gets a lot of their personal satisfaction from observing the happiness of others, and so is generally determined to please and serve their partners.

A problem area for ENFPs in relationships is their dislike of conflict and sensitivity to criticism. They are perfectionists who believe that any form of criticism is a stab at their character, which is very difficult for them to take. Conflict situations are sources of extreme stress to the ENFP. They have a tendency to brush issues under the rug rather than confront them head-on, if there is likely to be a conflict. They are also prone to "give in" easily in conflict situations, just to end the conflict. They might agree to something which goes against their values just to end the uncomfortable situation. In such cases, the problem is extended and will return at a later time. The ENFP needs to realize that conflict situations are not the end of the world. They are entirely normal, and can be quite helpful for the growth of a relationship. They also need to work on taking criticism for what it is, rather than blowing up any negative comment into an indictment against their entire character.

What about you? What is you need in life? Is it spicy/passionate/sporatic? Or are you more of a calmer/introverted/planner? Either way, once we understand who we are, we are able to move forward and concentrate on our characteristics.



Funny pic.. being silly!

 Personally, I like to throw a little spice in that. ;-)


PS - Side Bar:
Famous ENFP:

Franz Joseph Haydn


Samuel Clemens (Mark Twain)

Will Rogers

Buster Keaton

Theodor "Dr." Seuss Geisel (The Cat in the Hat)

Mickey Rooney

James Dobson ("Focus on the Family")

Andy Rooney

Carol Burnett

Paul Harvey

Elizabeth Montgomery (Bewitched)

Bill Cosby (Ghost Dad)

Dom Delouise, actor

Dave Thomas, owner of Wendy's hamburger chain

Lewis Grizzard, newspaper columnist

I. King Jordan, past president of Gallaudet University

Martin Short, actor-comedian

Meg Ryan, actor (When Harry Met Sally)

Robin Williams, actor, comedian (Dead Poet's Society, Mrs. Doubtfire)

Sandra Bullock, actor (Speed, While You Were Sleeping)

Robert Downey Jr.(Ironman)

Alicia Silverstone (Clueless)

Sinbad

Andy Kaufman

Regis Philbin

Will Smith

Insights from an Insightful Person

I am a part of all that I have met. ~Alfred Lord Tennyson
 
Yesterday, I spent almost 8 hours in the car with a co-worker of mine. Luckily, we are both talkers and comfortable with tackling all of the deep subjects that sometime cross my mind. It was nice to talk to someone who is intelligent and insightful.
 
We covered topics from Human Trafficking to Pedophiles to Female Genital Mutilation. We discussed Alabama Politics, Immigration Reform.. and finally - me.
 
Yesterday was tough. I woke up at 3:45am, drove to Mobile and drove back. If you are not familiar with Alabama geography - that is 4 hours there, and 4 hours back. I was struggling, and many of you know what it feels like when you are exhausted - headache, dehydration, dark circles, a little dizziness.. just a general feeling of discontent.
 
One of our first meetings was a tough one. We were meeting a very important person and needed to ask for very important things. Our expectations were high, but the reality was a different beast all together.
 
Or was it just my perception?
 
My com padre saw all of the positives. I was able to pull apart the negatives. Piece by piece.. over analyzing if you will.
 
At the end of it all - I simply boiled it down to - annoyance.
 
She asked - Why?
 
I listed several examples.. then she asked - Why do you let that bother you?
 
Good question.
 
Why do I let anything bother me? Why do other's actions/reactions get under my skin so deep? Why do I let people/places/things burrow in my psyche?
 
How do you set "mental" boundaries. Especially when you aren't expecting such a strong reaction?
 
I have often stated that I felt some people just have good chemistry, while others do not. I did NOT have good chemistry with this person. I am typically really good at "winning" people over - if I choose to do so.
 
She stated - "Maybe you are not used to not having people like you instantly."
 
Bingo.
 
But I also pride myself in truly not caring. But why do I care sometime?
 
I think it is because I walked in with high hopes of a glorious relationship. I walked away with the feeling of being patronized.
 
Welcome to the world of women in the workplace with powerful men. Add to it that they probably see me as a little girl.
 
Not an easy apple to chew.
 
Breathe. Regroup. Learn to set up mental boundaries.
 
What lessons have you learned this week?

What are you REALLY like? Sometimes it is hard to see what a person's personality is like when they write. Sure, you get a few little insights, but tone can be misinterpreted and so can intention.

On most occassions, I try to understand what it is I am trying to say, or what point I am trying make. Does it matter? Does it make sense? What IS the point to my ramblings.

Then I try to decide, would you care? Would it help you to know? Does it matter for you to know? Ahh... who knows..

I sometimes wish I had the guts to do a Vlog, but then again, I am afraid I would just ramble even more. I AM a talker. One thing would definitely surface (once my sweet southern genteel greetings were out of the way) - I am sooo sarcastic. So much so that I have ended friendships over it. Let me rephrase - PEOPLE have ended friendships over it, not me.

Sense of humor differs in different parts of the world. We all know this and we have all experienced this.  I tend to be a little cynical in verbiage and I am quick to make some (what I consider funny) "come backs." Yet, many more people are waaay sensitive and well, the "humor" kind of falls on deaf ears.

I find in different geographical areas my humor works. Say.. my friends from New England, or my friends from the West Coast.. or my friends who work in my specific field (media people.) If you are a friend of mine on FB you can see the witty banter taking place with my friends. Most of the people I am chatting with are one of three people: 1. My old TV co-workers (who are hilarious and quick witted) 2. People who I literally grew up with (and they all have a very thick skin) and 3. My besties (now.)

I say all of this, but you have got to know -  I do have a big heart. I just don't necessarily SHOW it outwardly. Maybe you guys have gotten a little glimpse into my inner workings  than the average person I come in contact with on a daily basis.

The reason I tell you all of this, I got an interesting email from someone who, after all of these years, STILL does not get me. I recently posted a FB status about how excited I was to be volunteering for a new organization. It's called Impact Family Counseling - it is an organization that partners children with people in the community. The catch is - these kids have parents that are incarcerated. My "friend"said, "Why would YOU want to do something like that." They went on to imply (since clearly in their mind I am not "cuddly") as to why I do all of this volunteer work at various places. I only replied, "Because I like it." The truth is - I LIVE for it.

I don't want to volunteer for a society group that randomly shows up and does a little work for the less fortunate. I want to get in there with the hardcore and make a difference. I like to challenge my emotions and my thoughts, expose myself to another "subculture" and see if I can make a difference and if THEY can make a difference in my life. These kids  - it's no joke. They have seen and possibly done things you and I can only imagine. But instead of sitting around and saying, "THEY need to do something and rehabilitate these families.." I am going to roll up my sleeves and try to help, in any way possible.

What about you? How are you perceived and how are you REALLY?

ENFP = ME

According to Myers Briggs (Jungian) Personality test - I am an Extroverted/Intuitive/Feeling/Perceiving. Also known as ENFP.



Okay. I actually agree with this one.



I took the personality test this morning after an interesting conversation with my sister yesterday afternoon. She was very excited about attending a writers conference in our hometown in Georgia. I was laughing as I was referring to the "networking" opportunity - whereas basically you are thrust into a boxed area and forced to make small talk. I expressed how I found it disconcerting how every time I find myself in such a situation, the most socially awkward person is always attracted to me, and suddenly attaches themselves to me. Without fail - every single time. This, in turn, makes me HATE networking opportunities.



My sister went on to say, "Well Nicole, it is because you give off this very friendly vibe. You are very charming."



I could not help but laugh. Me?? Friendly?? Me?? Charming?? Huh?

I suppose the idea never really occurred to me. I "see" myself as standoffish, cynical - though I am compassionate (I just don't show it outwardly.) I tend to voice my feelings through the written word only.. or only to my inner circle.



Many people think I am shy at first - but really I am just assessing the situation. Which in the middle of the conversation with my sister I realized - "I am not charming. I think... I am disarming."



Yep.



I watch people - then decide how to proceed. I draw people in.. then get my point across.

Anyway - I digress.



So - I decided to search out various personality types. When I did a google image search of a "disarming" person - this is what I found:

Interesting - choice.

Then I decided to research personality tests. Sure I had heard of the Myers Briggs test for many years. I decided to finally take it. To my surprise, I think the result is pretty dead on. (I always knew Carl Jung was da bomb!)

If you follow psychology - here is the "scientific" breakdown:

33% Extroverted

12% Intuitive

25% Feeling

22% Perceiving

I am:

-moderately expressed extrovert
-slightly expressed intuitive personality
-moderately expressed feeling personality
-slightly expressed perceiving personality

What does this mean? I found many, many examples of what this personality involves. I will only share the "easiest" explanation for it.

As an ENFP, my primary mode of living is focused externally, where I take things in primarily via my intuition.

My secondary mode is internal, where I deal with things according to how feel I about them, or how they fit in with my personal value system.

ENFPs are warm, enthusiastic people, typically very bright and full of potential. They live in the world of possibilities, and can become very passionate and excited about things.

Their enthusiasm lends them the ability to inspire and motivate others, more so than we see in other types. They can talk their way in or out of anything. They love life, seeing it as a special gift, and strive to make the most out of it.

ENFPs have an unusually broad range of skills and talents. They are good at most things which interest them.

Project-oriented, they may go through several different careers during their lifetime. To onlookers, the ENFP may seem directionless and without purpose, but ENFPs are actually quite consistent, in that they have a strong sense of values which they live with throughout their lives. Everything that they do must be in line with their values.

An ENFP needs to feel that they are living their lives as their true Self, walking in step with what they believe is right. They see meaning in everything, and are on a continuous quest to adapt their lives and values to achieve inner peace. They're constantly aware and somewhat fearful of losing touch with themselves.

Since emotional excitement is usually an important part of the ENFP's life, and because they are focused on keeping "centered", the ENFP is usually an intense individual, with highly evolved values.

An ENFP needs to focus on following through with their projects. This can be a problem area for some of these individuals. Unlike other Extraverted types, ENFPs need time alone to center themselves, and make sure they are moving in a direction which is in sync with their values. ENFPs who remain centered will usually be quite successful at their endeavors.

Others may fall into the habit of dropping a project when they become excited about a new possibility, and thus they never achieve the great accomplishments which they are capable of achieving.

Most ENFPs have great people skills. They are genuinely warm and interested in people, and place great importance on their inter-personal relationships. ENFPs almost always have a strong need to be liked. Sometimes, especially at a younger age, an ENFP will tend to be "gushy" and insincere, and generally "overdo" in an effort to win acceptance. However, once an ENFP has learned to balance their need to be true to themselves with their need for acceptance, they excel at bringing out the best in others, and are typically well-liked. They have an exceptional ability to intuitively understand a person after a very short period of time, and use their intuition and flexibility to relate to others on their own level.

Because ENFPs live in the world of exciting possibilities, the details of everyday life are seen as trivial drudgery. They place no importance on detailed, maintenance-type tasks, and will frequently remain oblivious to these types of concerns. When they do have to perform these tasks, they do not enjoy themselves. This is a challenging area of life for most ENFPs, and can be frustrating for ENFP's family members.

An ENFP who has "gone wrong" may be quite manipulative - and very good it. The gift of gab which they are blessed with makes it naturally easy for them to get what they want. Most ENFPs will not abuse their abilities, because that would not jive with their value systems.
ENFPs sometimes make serious errors in judgment. They have an amazing ability to intuitively perceive the truth about a person or situation, but when they apply judgment to their perception, they may jump to the wrong conclusions.

ENFPs who have not learned to follow through may have a difficult time remaining happy in marital relationships. Always seeing the possibilities of what could be, they may become bored with what actually is. The strong sense of values will keep many ENFPs dedicated to their relationships. However, ENFPs like a little excitement in their lives, and are best matched with individuals who are comfortable with change and new experiences.

Having an ENFP parent can be a fun-filled experience, but may be stressful at times for children with strong Sensing or Judging tendencies. Such children may see the ENFP parent as inconsistent and difficult to understand, as the children are pulled along in the whirlwind life of the ENFP. Sometimes the ENFP will want to be their child's best friend, and at other times they will play the parental authoritarian. But ENFPs are always consistent in their value systems, which they will impress on their children above all else, along with a basic joy of living.

ENFPs are basically happy people. They may become unhappy when they are confined to strict schedules or mundane tasks. Consequently, ENFPs work best in situations where they have a lot of flexibility, and where they can work with people and ideas. Many go into business for themselves. They have the ability to be quite productive with little supervision, as long as they are excited about what they're doing.

Because they are so alert and sensitive, constantly scanning their environments, ENFPs often suffer from muscle tension. They have a strong need to be independent, and resist being controlled or labelled. They need to maintain control over themselves, but they do not believe in controlling others. Their dislike of dependence and suppression extends to others as well as to themselves.

ENFPs are charming, ingenuous, risk-taking, sensitive, people-oriented individuals with capabilities ranging across a broad spectrum. They have many gifts which they will use to fulfill themselves and those near them, if they are able to remain centered and master the ability of following through.

ENFPs generally have the following traits:
Project-oriented
Bright and capable
Warmly, genuinely interested in people; great people skills
Extremely intuitive and perceptive about people
Able to relate to people on their own level
Service-oriented; likely to put the needs of others above their own
Future-oriented
Dislike performing routine tasks
Need approval and appreciation from others
Cooperative and friendly
Creative and energetic
Well-developed verbal and written communication skills
Natural leaders, but do not like to control people
Resist being controlled by others
Can work logically and rationally - use their intuition to understand the goal and work backwards towards it
Usually able to grasp difficult concepts and theories

ENFPs are lucky in that they're good a quite a lot of different things. An ENFP can generally achieve a good degree of success at anything which has interested them.

However, ENFPs get bored rather easily and are not naturally good at following things through to completion. Accordingly, they should avoid jobs which require performing a lot of detailed, routine-oriented tasks. They will do best in professions which allow them to creatively generate new ideas and deal closely with people. They will not be happy in positions which are confining and regimented.

The following list of professions is built on the impressions of careers which would be especially suitable for an ENFP. It is meant to be a starting place, rather than an exhaustive list. There are no guarantees that any or all of the careers listed here would be appropriate, or that the best career match is among those listed.

Possible Career Paths for the ENFP:
· Artist
· Art Director
· Actor
· Accountant/Auditor
· Banker/Economist
· Consultant
· Career Counselor
· Conference Planner
· Church Worker
· Diplomat
· Dietitian/Nutritionist
· Designer
· Entrepreneur
· Engineer
· Editor
· Human Resources
· Housing Director
· Homemaker
· Journalist
· Lawyer/AttorneyMusician

· Merchandise Planner
· Marketer
· Massage Therapist
· Nurse
· Newscaster
· Occupational Therapist
· Public Relations
· Psychologist/Counselor
· Painter
· Politician
· Project Manager
· Researcher
· Scientist
· Social Worker
· Speech Pathologist
· Social Scientist
· Senior Manager
· Trainer
· Teacher/Professor
· Technical SpecialistWriter

(Hmmm... I see my field... good.. good..)

ENFPs take their relationships very seriously, but also approach them with a childlike enthusiasm and energy. They seek and demand authenticity and depth in their personal relatio nships, and will put forth a lot of effort into making things work out. They are warm, considerate, affirming, nurturing, and highly invested in the health of the relationship. They have excellent interpersonal skills, and are able to inspire and motivate others to be the best that they can be. Energetic and effervescent, the ENFP is sometimes smothering in their enthusiasm, but are generally highly valued for their genuine warmth and high ideals.

ENFP Strengths
Most ENFPs will exhibit the following strengths with regards to relationships issues:
Good communication skills
Very perceptive about people's thought and motives
Motivational, inspirational; bring out the best in others
Warmly affectionate and affirming
Fun to be with - lively sense of humor, dramatic, energetic, optimistic
Strive for "win-win" situations
Driven to meet other's needs
Usually loyal and dedicated

ENFP Weaknesses
Most ENFPs will exhibit the following weaknesses with regards to relationship issues:
Tendency to be smothering
Their enthusiasm may lead them to be unrealistic
Uninterested in dealing with "mundane" matters such as cleaning, paying bills, etc.
Hold onto bad relationships long after they've turned bad
Extreme dislike of conflict
Extreme dislike of criticism
Don't pay attention to their own needs
Constant quest for the perfect relationship may make them change relationships frequently
May become bored easily
Have difficulty scolding or punishing others

ENFPs in Love
ENFPs make warm, considerate, passionate partners who are generally willing, eager, and able to do whatever it takes to make The Relationship a positive place to be. They are enthusiastic, idealistic, focused on other people's feelings, and very flexible. These attributes combine to make them especially interested in positive personal relationships, and also makes them very able to promote strong relationships in fun and creative ways. ENFPs take their commitments very seriously, and are generally deeply loyal and faithful to their partners.

There are a couple of difficult relationship areas for the ENFP. The first problem is that many ENFPs have a problem leaving bad relationships. They tend to internalize any problems and take them on their own shoulders, believing that the success or failure of the relationship is their own responsibility. As perfectionists, they don't like to admit defeat, and will stick with bad situations long after they should have left. When they do leave the relationship, they will believe that the failure was their fault, and that there was surely something they could have done to save the relationship.

On the entirely other end of the spectrum, many ENFPs have a difficult time staying focused and following things through to completion. If they have not focused on their ability to follow through, they may have problems staying in dedicated, monogamous relationships. They are so in tune with all of the exciting possibilities of what could be, that they will always fantasize about a greener pasture out there somewhere. If they are not paired with a partner who enjoys new experiences, or who shares their idealistic enthusiasm, the ENFP may become bored. The ENFP who is bored and who is not focused will be very unhappy, and will eventually "leave" the relationship if the problem is not addressed.

Since relationships are central to the ENFP's life, they will be very "hands on" and involved with their intimate relationships. They may be in the habit of constantly asking their partner how they're doing, what they're feeling, etc. This behavior may be a bit smothering, but it also supports a strong awareness of the health (or illness) of the relationship.

Romantically, The ENFP is creative, perfectionistic, playful and affectionate. Their rich fantasy world makes them fun and creative lovers, who usually have new ideas up their sleeves. They whole-heartedly embrace the opportunity for closeness with their mates, believing romantic intimacy to be a positive, fun way to express how much you love each other.

The ENFP needs to be given positive assurance and affirmation. More than one ENFP has been known to "go fishing" for compliments. They like to hear from their significant others that they are loved and valued, and are willing and eager to return the favor. They enjoy lavishing love and affection on their mates, and are creative and energetic in their efforts to please. The ENFP gets a lot of their personal satisfaction from observing the happiness of others, and so is generally determined to please and serve their partners.

A problem area for ENFPs in relationships is their dislike of conflict and sensitivity to criticism. They are perfectionists who believe that any form of criticism is a stab at their character, which is very difficult for them to take. Conflict situations are sources of extreme stress to the ENFP. They have a tendency to brush issues under the rug rather than confront them head-on, if there is likely to be a conflict. They are also prone to "give in" easily in conflict situations, just to end the conflict. They might agree to something which goes against their values just to end the uncomfortable situation. In such cases, the problem is extended and will return at a later time. The ENFP needs to realize that conflict situations are not the end of the world. They are entirely normal, and can be quite helpful for the growth of a relationship. They also need to work on taking criticism for what it is, rather than blowing up any negative comment into an indictment against their entire character.

Generally, the ENFP is a warm and affirming creature who is very interested and able to have an intense, meaningful, close relationship with their mate.

There you have it. My personality in a nutshell. What is interesting - refer to my Aquarius blog. Similar personality. I wonder if these personalities are linked cosmically. How many Aquarians are ENFP? Hmmm....