Official New Year's Resolutions

"Every man should be born again on the first day of January. Start with a fresh page. Take up one hole more in the buckle if necessary, or let down one, according to circumstances; but on the first of January let every man gird himself once more, with his face to the front, and take no interest in the things that were and are past." ~Henry Ward Beecher


I suppose it is time I tackle that official New Year's Resolution list. Even if just for fun.

The thing about New Year's resolutions, where in the world did this idea come from?  Why do we torture ourselves with setting such high expectations?

Regardless.. I am a BIG fan of making lists, so clearly, I engage in this activity.

For fun, I thought I would google search "How to Make a New Year's Resolution."  The first thing that popped up was ehow.com

Allow me to present the instructions on how to make a proper New Year's Resolution (brought to you by ehow.com)

1.  Be realistic by setting achievable goals. Winning the lottery, for example, is out of your grasp.


2.Describe your resolutions in specific terms. Instead of "I don't want to be lazy," opt for "I want to exercise regularly" or "I will cut down on my television watching."


3.Break down large goals into smaller ones. For instance, commit to losing weight by resolving to join a gym and improve your eating habits.


4.Find alternatives to a behavior that you want to change, and make this part of your resolution plan. So you want to quit smoking but you smoked to relax yourself? What other forms of relaxation are available to you?

5.Above all, aim for things that are truly important to you, not what you think you ought to do or what others expect of you.

Here are 4 more:

1. Be sure that you keep your list of New Year's resolutions short and realistic. By doing this, you will be far more likely to keep your New Year's Resolutions and not feel overwhelmed by them.



2.Be sure that you begin your list of New Year's resolutions with a small goal. For example, a New Year's resolution to make new friends is a small goal. As the year progresses, you can change, evaluate and increase your goals to fit your situation and the direction of your life.


3.Be sure that you are persistent. Persistence is important and will enable you to remain focused on your New Year's resolutions. In doing so, you are more likely to successfully keep your New Year's resolutions.


4. Be sure that you have patience with yourself. Remember that keeping your New Year's resolutions will take you some time. After all, even Rome took longer than one day to build!

Okay, I think we all have the tools now for a proper New Year's Resolution.

Soooo... here it goes:

Nicole's New Year's Resolutions for 2011

1. Most important one of the year - practice Trust. I will make a promise to myself to learn to be more trusting of the process, of advice, of the universe.

2. Get back into my exercise routine at the Y. Head back to my Body Jam and Zumba classes. *Perhaps talk to my personal trainer about weights 2 x a week (start that one in Feb.)

3. Find a few free lance writing projects.

4. Study arabic at least once a week.

5.  Pray daily.

6. Continue to write daily on my blog.

7. Reopen my personal journal (leather book here) and begin the more personal items for private writing.

8. Declutter - sell my dining room furniture, the twin bed, and the desk. Donate items in storage.

9. Stick to my Mediterranean diet plan the cardiologist gave me.

10. Find a new volunteer opportunity.

11. Show compassion. (Better yet, learn to be compassionate.)

12. Listen more.

13. Turn my sunroom into a ZEN room. Practice meditation.

14. Smile, breathe, go slowly.

15. Try to come off at least one of the BP meds by practicing healthier behaviors.

16. Make new friends.

17. Make that BIG move with grace and a positive attitude.

18. Learn to save money, and actually do it.

19. Find a new place of worship.

20. Finally - use the 8/8/8 rule - 8 hours of sleep, 8 hours for Nicole, 8 hours for work.

What about you? Share your top 3 New Year's Resolutions.

Back on the wagon

I am back on the wagon - the Mediterranean Diet. I totally got off the strict version of the lifestyle change back in January. (I ended up with viral Meningitis) and I felt like crap. What do I do when I feel like crap? I eat crap. Yes, I know.. it makes no sense.

Then I spiraled into crap eating... and I think I have headed down the wrong end.. and gained about 5 pounds.

I was using the personal trainer, but heading home and eating chips. Crap. Crap. Crap.

Yesterday I restocked the frig with some heart healthy options. Lots of fruit: blueberries, strawberries, peaches, bananas, pears, and plums. My veggie options are excellent: cucumbers, sweet peppers, bell peppers, onions, eggplant, scallions.. and of course an array of fresh herbs.

This morning I kicked things off (egypt style) - I had about a 1/2 cup of Greek Plain Yogurt, Gorgonzola Cheese and a small saucer of blue berries.

God willing.. I can stick to this again. The egyptian and I had a long discussion about food, and I think we did a good job. He WANTS to eat like he did back home, and I am trying. Really I am.

On the other part of my life front: LOTS of work ahead at work. This is exciting news! The Birmingham American Heart Association landed two BIG corporate partners. For our Birmingham Heart Ball, Wachovia/Wells Fargo has come on board. Then for the Start! campaign - Baptist Health System is our big (3 year deal) cause partner. For Mobile, Virginia College came on board for the Heart Ball.

What does that mean? It means that I will be pushing pushing pushing to promote their involvement. So .. not just making our VP happy, I will be working hard for three other CEOS out there. Trust me, these guys invest a LOT of money in us, and we have to over deliver. This is exciting, and taxing all at the same time.

As far as leisure activities - I have to tell you, I went and saw the movie Inception. OMG.
Go see it. It was sooooooooooo intense. Sooooo intense. Many layers and deep. Kind of a mind f*ck if you will.

Okay.. enough of that.

What big changes or small changes are you hoping to incorporate into your week?

Transitional Transitions

They must often change, who would be constant in happiness or wisdom. ~Confucius

There is one thing that I am certain of at this point in my life - change is inevitable.

Simple as that.

It is officially the first days of summer, though in the deep south I believe we went from winter to summer back in April. However, officially the season did just change. Our fiscal year at work is winding down - and with that comes massive change. I am cycling into a new wave of comfort in my "new marriage." Friends are losing relatives (old age - sickness - death.) Marriages are happening. Divorces are happening. People are moving. Moving here - moving on. Change.

How well do you handle change? For me, I like it. Honestly! Or perhaps, I am just conditioned to handle it. As a child, we moved a lot. From birth to graduating from high school, my family lived in 7 homes. In college, I had 8 different room mates. I lived in 5 different places. As a young adult (and single) I lived in 4 different apartments. Once married I lived in 8 different homes.

I have lived with a guy, and married twice. I have had dozens of boyfriends, numerous BFFs, started and stopped a handful of jobs. All of my grandparents and most relatives have died. I have lost three friends to suicide (including one ex boyfriend) and two of my best guy friends died (one in an automobile accident, and one mysteriously in his sleep.)

I have been given bad new numerous times dealing with my health. I recovered. I have come close to making MASSIVE life changing mistakes - and saved in just the nick of time.

I can adjust to any given situation. I expect things to change. I am not sure if I could handle staying stagnant.

Which makes me think of people who chose to stay close to home, and pick (in my humble opinion) safe jobs and take root prefer things to NOT change. Perhaps they thrive on consistency.

I have dear friends, that chose to marry young, have babies, get a "normal" job, buy a house, go to church on Sunday (and Wed), attend softball tournaments on the weekend, and BBQ with relatives.. while saving up once a year for that quick trip to Florida. That's it. That's their reality.

Forever. And ever, And ever. WOW.

My life resembles NONE of this. How different would I be if I chose to settle down in one place? Would I be more peaceful? What if I picked a job that did not have the goal-oriented, fast past and creativity of media and settled for.. oh I don't know.. selling insurance or running a dry cleaners? Would I find satisfaction in doing the same thing day in and day out?

What if, I had chosen to have children (before the hysterectomy)? I suppose I would have to stay put (for school.) How does that work??

The skies the limit for me. The only person holding me back from forever changing is myself.

If you are a stranger to BIG change - I found some tips that could help you adjust:

*** source Psychology Today - the coolest magazine in the world. Written by: Alex Lickerman

When I was a child, I was afraid to go to summer camp. Most kids found the prospect exciting and the experience fun, but I dreaded it. What would the activities be like? Who would my counselors be? What other kids were going? Would I be made to swim if I didn't want to?

After a few days, the camp routine became just that—routine—and I settled down. But transition periods remained challenging for me throughout my adolescence. As adults, many of us still struggle with change-even good change, like starting a new job, moving to a nicer house, or getting married. Just what is it about transition periods we find so challenging and how can we get through them with less stress?

THE GREAT UNKNOWN
In my case, transitions were difficult because they represented a change from the known to the unknown. The unknown, for many of us, feels unsafe. We worry the unknown, once known, will prove to be more than we can handle, a problem we can't solve. It's easy to be confident when you know exactly what you're facing and how to overcome it, but far harder to be confident when what you're facing is unclear. So we try to learn as many details as we can about whatever knew environment we're about to enter, striving to make the abstract more concrete for the purpose of measuring ourselves against it, of finding ways to minimize any potential dangers.

A DIFFERENT APPROACH




But in doing this we sell ourselves short. Why not instead view transition periods as ways to exercise our ability to manage change? If the last time you faced a transition you found yourself a wreck—anxiously overreacting, struggling to get a good night's sleep, snapping at your loved ones out of fear—why not look upon your next transition as practice. Reflect on and catalog your reactions during transitions as they occur. Then each time you find yourself facing a new one, pick one thing you didn't do well during your last one. Maybe you belittled your abilities, failing to believe you were up to the job for which you were hired. Maybe you worried incessantly about how you were going to handle all the details of a move. Whatever reaction you had that you'd like to improve, during this next transition focus on it and it alone. Don't worry about failing to live up to any other expectation. Just strive to improve this one thing. If, when you're through the transition, you find you didn't, that's okay, too. The beauty of viewing transition periods as practice for improving yourself is that you get to keep trying until you do.

Further:
Just do it. It may be a cliche to say that half the battle is just showing up, but cliches are cliches for a specific reason: they're true. Remind yourself you don't have to be perfect and that you don't have to do everything at once. Just getting through a transition is the definition of success.

Look upon transitions—even negative transitions—as adventures. You can change poison into medicine. Even if you're fired. Even if you get divorced. Even if you become chronically ill. We all have the innate ability to create value out of hardship, and in so doing often add an enjoyable dimension to our lives we didn't have before.

Remake your reputation. A transition is also an opportunity to re-brand yourself. Perhaps you called in sick too much on your last job and want to become a better employee. Perhaps you allowed life's small inconveniences to irritate you too much and want to become a more carefree person. If you look upon a transition period as an opportunity to change yourself, you'll be able to introduce a better self to the new people you meet. But take care not to fall prey to the misguided notion that simply by changing your physical location you'll change anything else about your life. Unless you change yourself, you'll recreate the same old life you always had, just in a new space.

Transitions are part and parcel of life, in which nothing ever stands still or remains the same. To learn to navigate transitions therefore is to learn to navigate life itself. Take the time to reflect on how you handle transitions. Plan ways to improve. Because if you can learn to face transition periods with equanimity, not much else will be left in life to disturb you.


Let's embrace change - whether it is personal, professional, financial or spiritual. Change is good. Change is necessary.

How do you handle change?

A new perspective

This summer is really turning out quite nicely.

I have successfully moved to a new office.

I have great relationships with my co-workers.

The egyptian and I are working on finding our routine. (We even went to the gym together tonight. I was quite impressed with his ability to run really fast for a very long time.)

I have tried hard to show my family that I am there for them.

I have removed myself from people who make me feel uncomfortable, or just rub me the wrong way.

I finally headed back to the ob/gyn and got that mammogram I was supposed to have two years ago. I spent two glorious days relaxing by the pool, reading, drinking my water, swimming, and making a few new acquaintances.

I bought a few books for summer reading - all from the Salvation Army.

I am heading down to Mobile/Pensacola for a three day blitz of media sponsorship meetings - and guess who is coming with me???? My egyptian!! He will chill at the B & B - but I am SUPER excited to take him with me.

I worked out a better schedule with the Personal Trainer.

I am scheduled to start my dance classes (Ball Room Dancing this time - specifically Latin (of course.)!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Did you notice the extra exclamation points?? I get two private lessons and one group/party dance class as my introduction... then I enter the official class I want to take. Guess who owns the studio and will be teaching??????????????

Did you watch Dancing with the Stars??

Fabian Sanchez!! The Mambo King! Seriously!!!!!!!





I am trying to turn my "stay-cation" this summer into an action-packed good time to work on me! You guys know I have been toying with different ideas for this and that. I know I mentioned a week or so ago that I had a better idea what I could do.. and I finally made a decision that made sense for me.

Dance classes, personal training, weight watchers using the mediterranean diet, day trips to explore alabama, meeting new and interesting people, and spending time losing myself in good books - that's how my summer is shaping up!

I am beginning to see color again. Does that make sense? My journey feels like a different type of transition - an internal one.

I am optimistic about the future.

What are you optimistic about this summer?