THEN - I came home. T-I-R-E-D. No doubt. Not sure why, but the eyes were wanting to close. The egyptian and I sat and laughed for about an hour or so - then we started cooking dinner. Sooo... I decided that the eggplant he made was too "oily" and since I had to go to my Body Jam class, it might make me sick. In brilliant form, I opt for some mac & cheese. (Uh huh.) Finally I drag myself to the gym, and my brilliant idea almost took me out. Seriously. Stomach was sooooooo full and I felt like I weighed 500 pounds and could not lift my legs. LOL.
Needless to say, I made it through without running for the door. We had three instructors tonight, an african american girl from the Bronx, a latina from Columbia and a typical white, southern instructor (there is a reason I am sharing this. I want you to get a mental picture.) We started off with some cool moves from the chick from NYC... moved on to the fast past of the Latina.. then skinny white biotch comes in. (Sorry.. I HAVE to go there. You will see why in a sec.)
The attitude and atmosphere was super fun and quirky with the first two instructors. THEN the annoying, no-rhythm instructor starts up. Showing us some seriously outdated techno-esque moves.. then.. as we are getting into and doing these arm moves as if we are in a rave rolling on Ecstasy - she started screaming into her head microphone, "Come ON! You know what we WANT? DISCIPLINE. THAT'S RIGHT. REMEMBER, THIS IS AN AEROBICS CLASS - NOT JUST A DANCE CLASS. THEY DON'T CALL IT BODY JAM (EMPHASIS ON BODY) FOR NOTHING. YOU KNOW YOU ALL WANT TO BE A SIZE FOUR."
Hold up a hot minute.
.........
Did I EVER say I wanted to be a size 4? What woman, besides perhaps someone shorter than me and with a tiny bone structure SHOULD be a size 4.
It was as if someone sucked the oxygen right out of the room. I wanted to punch skinny biotch in her rock hard abs and tell her to go sell crazy somewhere else. The majority of people in my class are averaging ages around 28 - 48, and more like a size 10 - 16, versus super tiny. (Uh.. that would be the ZUMBA class.. the HIP HOP class has more of an ethnically diverse group, who generally may carry a little more in the hips, thighs and butt area.)
I only remember one other time actually walking out of a Body Jam class - and it was when SHE was teaching.. and it was only b/c the moves were so lame and I got bored. I faked like I had to be somewhere. Should have known.
Yuck.
