It is time to cross that bridge

Literally, it is time to cross that bridge. Yes - I have come to it.

I have a little time to myself, so I apologize for a second post of the day. However, I had some time to think.

I know.. I know.. "What is going on now?"
Nothing, I promise.
I was thinking about how my fiscal year at work is coming to an end. Basically all of our numbers and goals will be reviewed. Many of us feel like we are what we do. Too often, I identify myself by my profession. But at the end of the day - that's just not true.

This afternoon, as I was driving back from dropping the egyptian off at work, I decided to roll down the windows and open the sun roof. I drive a silver VW bug - and it is cute and fast. I am blaring some Kid Rock, have my shades on, and racing down I-459, heading back home. I realized sooo many things.

1. I am sooo lucky to have the man that I have. No, he is not perfect. Sometimes he is down right a pain in the ass - but I love how much I am in love with him. I love being in love. I thank GOD for being attracted to him. You have to understand, I was married before (a total of togetherness - 8 years.) I was NOT attracted to him, nor was I 'in love' with him. I was just tired of dating, and decided - fine. This one will do. It is such a RELIEF to have found love - even in my mid-thirties.

2. I do have a pretty cool job. I love the written word, I love learning about health - and I get to take both of those elements and sell it to the media. I am in Media Relations/Marketing and I am right smack dab in the middle of the deep south (aka - the stroke belt.) I work for an organization that tries to get people to make healthy lifestyle changes. I am the only one in the state responsible for getting this word out. I use every single media outlet in Alabama -and as a former journalist - this rocks. I am saving lives. Sort of.

3. I love my home. I really do. Yes, I am in an apartment. But I love my little place. I have a wonderful marble, wood burning fire place. I have the cutest little kitchen. I have a kick-ass sun room with skylights (and yes, I am on the top floor.) I have a gigantic garden tub that I love to take a nice hot bubble bath in. The sun shines perfectly into my apartment all day. It has such a nice vibe. I am content. There is a racket ball court, two swimming pools, jacuzzi, gym, movie theater, tennis courts, and a wooded walking trail. I am pleased to be here.

4. Right now - I am fine. I am healthy. As far as I can tell. I say this, because we all know that I have to go back for a mammogram (another) and an ultrasound on Monday morning. Monday my life can change drastically or it will remain peaceful. For now - I have happiness. I will savor it.

5. My family is alive and well.

6. My friends are some of the absolute coolest, intelligent, culturally diverse people you will ever meet.

7. There are soooo many things to look forward to this week: getting the results; heading down to Mobile/Pensacola/New Orleans; starting back into my dance classes (this time Latin Ballroom.); etc.

I am writing this today - because I have been the biggest whiny butt about life, and crappy people, and health problems, and what not.

The truth is - screw it all.

I am fine for now. People will be people  - dysfunctional or not. Family is family. I am lucky to have mine all together. Work is meaningful. And I am in love.

If the tides turn on Monday, then I will cross that bridge. Regardless of the outcome, to be honest with myself - they will change. I have to let go of all of this BS and get on with my life.

I am in a good place. I have everything I need. More importantly, and I will not forget this - I have faith. Faith in God. Thank goodness I am a spiritual person. How could I function, if not?

I know I was planning on working on me. I think now - time to stop the planning and sharing, and get living. All the rest - is crap.

This too shall pass.. and the Destination is still Unknown.