I'm moving into another chapter, another phase - one for which I am completely unprepared for. I have discovered that when faced with myself, I still have a lot of healing to do.
It all boils down to trust - and I am in short supply.
It's going to be the thorn that pokes in my side. Why? Because all of my experiences with love and life and loss all boil down to broken trust.
That's a hard road to travel.
Some people are lucky. They simply find and attract the people, places, instances that are trustworthy. For whatever reason, I do the opposite. Never knew why...
Clearly it has something to do with me.
I've got to heal that, or I will be toxic to another person or situation.
I decided this morning that I need to pull myself closer to God. He has opened new doors and windows and I need to be fully invested in the present. I need to stop looking behind me, and I need to stop wondering how the story will end (or assuming I know how it will end.) I need to only concentrate on today, keep a positive attitude and stop being so damned afraid of getting hurt.
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