It's going to be one of those days.
I think for the first time in almost 2 weeks (yes, 2 weeks to today) ~ that I am able to truly NOT WORRY.
I don't know if it was the long ass interview yesterday, or me telling the egyptian what I thought about everything, or just finally being on my knees and asking God for a little mercy... there is something so freeing about being at the very bottom. I can't explain it.
Maybe it's the fact that I am such a perfectionist when it comes to having a great job, great relationship, etc. Maybe when I surrendered to reality, I was free.
Whatever happened, I am glad it did. Call it a wake up call, call it what ever you want. There is sense of freedom in it and I am happy. Not happy in a "I am feeling successful" kind of way, but more so in a "surrender" way. Can't explain it. The control freak has surrendered. Imagine that?
I am choosing to chill today. Nothing real to worry about, nothing within my control. I am in my pjs, drinking my coffee. I have everything I need for today, and that's all that matters. The rest are just details.
I am sure this feeling won't last - but for now it's nice.
I will meditate on Jeremiah 29:11 (which has become my absolute favorite Bible verse) -
"For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."
I am still in music mode, because it is the poor man's therapy. Here are a few songs I have listened to this morning... maybe the words have contributed to my "good mood."
Have a GREAT Friday. Try to "chill out" !
3 comments:
Sometimes we have to be stripped down to be built back up. There's power in being free... Glad you've found it! God is soooo amazing & SO are you... all is well!
So glad you have found a peacefulness today. Enjoy. Soak it in.
These songs put me in a great mood too! I'm glad you can find joy in the small, simple things of life even during this difficult time.
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