What is the secret?

I really wish I knew the secret to happiness. The real key component.
And don't tell me it is in religion, because I believe in God and all of the other pieces that go with it, and nothing in faith ever promises an easy time here on earth. Nothing.

Talking about it doesn't solve anything. Drinking only numbs. Exercise only speeds up the heart to match the mind... which in turn gives the illusion that there is clarity. Silence only causes us to brood.

Is it in being perfect? I am far from it and screw up all the time. I do things I tell myself I should not do. I choose paths I know will only cause me pain in the end.

What is it we (humans) are trying to prove?

Maybe it is best to stay safe. Not to live out loud. Not to wear your heart on your sleeve and scream , "Hey world - I am alive and I am here to play the game.. so bring it."

Shit..

I don't know.

For once in my life, I am trying to stay true to my heart. My mind, body and soul are all in alignment. But my mouth gets me in trouble more often than not. Some call it sarcasm, others call it sass. Just know folks - sass does not translate in other languages well.

Back to square 1. Where a joke is not a joke. Where promises are sometimes broken. And hearts can easily break.

Damn Damn Damn.

C'est la vie... or perhaps.. just ma vie.